Never mind.
May. 22nd, 2011 09:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sinnamongirlI'm so drunk. I came out to the living room and Ben launched into this complaint about my cousin's kid... and all I could think was, "This is what you choose to be a dick about?" This kid who's been raised watching Dr. Who and reading JRR Tolkien and you're complaining because this nerdling idolizes you and is awkwardly trying to get your attention?
Then it crashed down, all the stress, and I took off. I meant to take a walk, burn it off and come home, but I stopped by the Plaid and got a snack and a winebox and listened to the lady complain and couldn't hold anything in for much longer. I went outside and my lip wobbled, but I pulled myself together, looked up, there was the 'open' sign for the Pearl before me. I had a double whiskey and pint of Pabst, read some from The Parable of the Sower (READ IT!!!) and listened to the only other customer talk about dinosaurs with the bartender. That was cool. Then I walked to the park and cried a bunch.
Why does my dad gotta be full-on crazy? Why does Ben gotta be a dick about a little kid who's sort of annoying? What the fuck am I doing with my life???
So. Yeah. Drunk. I've got very few coping skills left. At least I got a walk in today, even if it was drunken and wobblying and tearful and anytime a car went by I averted my snotty face shamedly. Pshaw. More and more, every day, the 'van by the side of the river' idea sounds so much better...
Then it crashed down, all the stress, and I took off. I meant to take a walk, burn it off and come home, but I stopped by the Plaid and got a snack and a winebox and listened to the lady complain and couldn't hold anything in for much longer. I went outside and my lip wobbled, but I pulled myself together, looked up, there was the 'open' sign for the Pearl before me. I had a double whiskey and pint of Pabst, read some from The Parable of the Sower (READ IT!!!) and listened to the only other customer talk about dinosaurs with the bartender. That was cool. Then I walked to the park and cried a bunch.
Why does my dad gotta be full-on crazy? Why does Ben gotta be a dick about a little kid who's sort of annoying? What the fuck am I doing with my life???
So. Yeah. Drunk. I've got very few coping skills left. At least I got a walk in today, even if it was drunken and wobblying and tearful and anytime a car went by I averted my snotty face shamedly. Pshaw. More and more, every day, the 'van by the side of the river' idea sounds so much better...
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no subject
Date: 2011-05-23 04:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-23 08:53 pm (UTC)I hope you're doing okay :-/
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Date: 2011-05-23 10:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-24 06:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-23 08:54 pm (UTC)